Mummers Monster

The Mummers Monster can be seen every January 1st, on 2 Street in South Philadelphia, getting drunk and belligerent. And playing banjo while dressed in his sequined fanciest. And that's where I will be tomorrow.

AND!

Thus ends the Month o' Monsters! And the year 2010 as well! We did it!

Snooter Monster

There's nothing in the rule books that says a Snooter can't play basketball.

This has never been a problem because Snooters are terrible at basketball. Even worse than Wolf Monsters.

Snow Monster

It snowed a lot this past weekend, so I drew a snow monster. Isn't life funny sometimes?

Sea Monster

Nothing special here. Just a typical Sea Monster.

Big Handed Alien Monster

Well, you've got to hand it to him.

Hand what? I don't know. Leave me alone.

Toenail Monster

Uch...I...I just...

I'm sorry, I need to go puke now.

Lemon Head Monster

I know, I know, it looks more like a lime.

But it smells like a lemon.

I know, it smells like garbage. Just give me a break, alright?

Tooth Monster

The Tooth Monster was known for its role in the development of modern dentistry. Tooth Monsters were studied extensively by dentists and dental hygienists alike, with their mouths forced open for sometimes upwards of 8 hours at a time. It was this forced altruism that eventually led to their extinction. However, we now have them to thank for the invention of plaque candy.

Not Bird Monster

Birds have feathers. The Not Bird has feather.

Shadowy Devil Dog

Not affiliated with Drake's Foods.

Slippers Monster

"OH MY GOD HAS ANYONE SEEN MY CAR KEYS? I'M GOING TO BE LATE FOR WORK!!!"

Slime Monster

Is it true that the Slime Monster once played an integral part in the production of 1980s cult children's television show "You Can't Do That On Television"?

I don't know.

Crying Monster

Oh..wait...no, don't...don't cry...

Come on crying monster, I didn't...

Aw man...

Sawnose Monster

The Sawnose Monster would be an unrivaled lumberjack if it weren't for its debilitating tree allergies.

Hand Holder Monsters

The Hand Holder Monsters are notoriously good square dancers. They usually enter square dancing competitions and take the money they win to offset the cost of their therapist.

Blob Monster

What's that you're knitting, Blob Monster? A death shroud? Oh, it's lovely.

Hipster Vampire

"I only drink organic blood. And PBR."

Annie Hall Kinetic Typography

Annie Hall Kinetic Typography from Jason Clarke on Vimeo.

I totally forgot about this kinetic type piece I made earlier this year.

Hurt-Man! Opening Titles

Hurt-Man! Opening Titles from Jason Clarke on Vimeo.

The opening credits to the animated adventures of Hurt-Man!

Made with Maya, After Effects, Photoshop, Illustrator, Soundtrack Pro and GarageBand.

Flying Eyeball Monster

No, the Flying Eyeball Monster is not related to the Eyeball Monster. Don't even ask!

Hurt-Man Shreds!

Stay tuned...

Chip Monster

The chip monster loves chips. Potato, especially.

Its favorite genre of music is chiptune, naturally.

Hulk Monster

Not the Incredible Hulk Monster. Just a generic Hulk Monster.

Yes, I realize they both have torn, purple shorts.

I promise I'll have a better monster tomorrow.

Mosquito Monster

These guys make the most annoying sound when eating. They're also really annoying to watch Jeopardy with.

Wolf Monster

Nothing to see here. Just a Wolf Monster (No, not a werewolf [Yes, there's a difference. Wolf Monsters suck at basketball]).

Bigmouth

Bigmouth might look scary, but fear not; it only eats berries that fall from treetops. Oh, and people. Sometimes it eats people.

The Smiths song was not named after this monster, but the other way around.

Zapatos Monster

The Zapatos Monster has been extinct for almost a few decades. Anyone who went to a shoe store up until the mid-1970s could tell you that shoe shopping was synonymous with hearing their horrible shrieking. In 1984, they were officially taken off the Endangered Species list by the Reagan Administration. In fact, the Reagan's added to the traditional Easter Egg Hunt, a Zapatos Monster Massacre, wherein all the remaining of their kind were dumped on to the White House lawn, and the children were encouraged to hunt them down and beat them to death with the government provided Wiffle Bats with Nails in Them™.

Zapatos Monsters did not originate in any Spanish-speaking areas. They are from Canton, OH.

Hairy Monster

A couple common misconceptions about the Hairy Monster.

1. His name is not Harry.
2. He is not a bigfoot. His feet are a normal-sized Men's 9.5 (EUR 42). His body is just incredibly tiny.
3. Yes, you can give him your band's demo tape, but he probably won't listen to it.

Cool Glasses Monster

This is the Cool Glasses Monster (or CGM). The CGM has some pretty cool glasses, but if you compliment him on them, he merely shrugs his shoulders and nonchalantly states that he got them from a dollar store. No big deal.

Speaking of cool glasses, I was at the Brooklyn Comics and Graphics Fest on Saturday, and picked up a rad comic by cool Philly comics dude Pat Aulisio. Pat's latest book, Math Fiction, is huge, and printed in stereoscopic 3D. It's better than Avatar!

Bear Monster

In 1897, famed Monster Farmer and phosphates dealer Salious J. Waterpinker wondered what would happen if someone crossed a bear and a monster. Then his wife threw a plate at his head, cursed his drunkenness, and reminded him that such a thing existed already. It was called a Bear Monster, and the Waterpinkers had already accrued an enormous debt by purchasing three of them and having them shipped from Laos. Spoiler: The Bear Monsters all died in transit.

Tongue Monster

The Tongue Monster is now making its second appearance on this website, this time rendered more faithfully to what it actually looks like. The tongue, you will notice, is a shade of blue not unlike another monster, the Okapi. This same tongue is so large in the Tongue Monster's mouth, that it prevents it from eating, drinking, spitting or breathing. This means that the Tongue Monster has an incredibly short life span. Just barely enough time to catch a movie (if the lines aren't too long), buy a pair of steel-toed boots, and have little baby Tongue Monsters who lead the same, pointless, spit-free life.

Worm Monster

The Worm Monster resembles an earthworm, all the way down to his freakishly large hands. Unlike the common earthworm, however, this monster uses his hands mainly for clapping. Since monsters typically do not frequent operas or comedy clubs, all of this clapping is usually out of place, unnecessary, and quite annoying. The Worm Monster's advanced digestive system then takes the annoyance and processes it into energy. It is then passed out of the system by what human medical science calls "tooting".

Three-Mouthed Monster!

The top mouth is fer kissin'!

Happy Monstercember!

I can't believe it's already here!

Happy End of Movember

To celebrate the end of Movember, it's the return of the Moustache Monster!
The moustache monster is also here to kick off the month of monsters. One monster a day for the next month! I promise! I know I haven't updated this in a while, but trust me on this one. One monster drawing. Every day. For the next whole month. I can do this.

Stoner Jamz

So, between classes, I managed to make another comic. I submitted this to Secret Prison for their third issue. Fingers crossed!

30 Second Squares

Here's what I've been doing with my time the past couple days.

30 Second Squares from Jason Clarke on Vimeo.

Another Self-Portrait

Grad school is serious business.

Self-Portrait

This is for an assignment for grad school.

MINE!

A Burtonesque tale of greed, paranoia and confusion.

Totally 80s Pee Wee

I don't train Pee Wees, I just make them.

Weird Animals Cont.

Snakebear and Owlosapien.

Weird Animals

Hobo Fun

A fun hobo.

Girl Dreaming of Ragnarok

I saw this girl looking bored at a meeting in the mall. I could only assume she was passing the time by daydreaming about the Norse tale describing the final days of earth.

Weird Dude

I came up with this on a train while listening to Tame Imapala's album Innerspeaker. The background was inspired by MC Hammer pants.

Yeti and a Surfboard

The surf! It is up!

Flat Hippo

Choking!

Acch!!!

PACC Drawings

Today was the 2nd Annual Philadelphia Alternative Comic Con. I got to hang with some cool people, sell some dumb comics, and make some weird drawings. Here's the drawings!